Goodbye 2010...

I'm just not sure I'm ready to welcome 2011 yet! Where has time gone?! I'm not sure if it's the weather, the cold, or the fact that I'm even closer to 30 than I'd like to be... but I'm just a little depressed lately. It seems like things are NOT going the way that I want them to.

I had so many great intentions for my 30 by 30 list... I have a couple of them accomplished, one or two more to blog about still, a few I'm working on still, and some I haven't even touched. I guess my big stress right now is that there are 2 or 3 on there that it seems like, no matter what I do, I'm not any closer to accomplishing them than I was in September when I started... and I feel like I'm never going to get there.

I don't want to be a cry baby or a whiner - but I'm seriously struggling here. I want to cry and whine even though I know it won't help. I'm trying desperately to find a new job! I've got to get a different job - my current job is going to be the death of me! I'm overly stressed, under paid, and for the most part I don't even like it anymore. It makes me so sad because I have loved this job for the past 6 1/2 years - but every day, I realize more and more how unhappy it makes me - How stressed I am - How much I dread going to work, checking my email, etc. - How I have NO LIFE but work... I can't live like this anymore.

Unfortunately, out of the dozens of resumes I've sent to places I've only had 2 interviews in the past 4 months. One where I was the company's second choice (how do you choose someone with 9 months of experience when you can choose someone with 15 years of experience - they chose 15 years). The other, a good friend of mine got me the interview - but the company isn't hiring a social worker right now, so that didn't really go anywhere. But, to this particular friend - you are the best! Thanks for looking out for me and giving a good word... You know who you are - and I know I don't say it enough - but you're the best!

Additionally, we've been married for almost 2 years - and yes, we've been trying to have babies the entire time but we need help to make it happen (if it is possible at all)... I know this, yet every time I am more than 5 days late (i'm currently 2 weeks late - and clearblue says that I'm NOT) - I get my hopes up... and then every time it happens a little part of me cries. I try to be brave and pretend it doesn't bother me and that I'm okay with it not happening right now - but truth be told - I'm terrified that it will never happen. I always thought i would have all of my kids by the time I was 30 - just like my mom did (the twins came 4 days before she turned 30) - but now I'm just hoping to have 1 by 35.

Travis and I have talked and decided that as soon as we have our debt paid off (besides student loans and a mortgage) that we will go see someone about it... Right now we are looking at late March/early April for having our debt paid off (it would have been sooner but my car ended up needing some seriously expensive work done last week)... And then we will see what happens.

I need to relax... I am sure things will happen when they are supposed to - but I'm getting a little tired of waiting. Patience is a virtue that I do not possess!

Cleaning House

No, I'm not really cleaning my house - although I should be for this weeks Christmas Celebration... I'm cleaning "house" in facebook and in my blog. I'm deleting people and deleting blogs. There are people who I am "friends" with on facebook that I've never considered "friends". Why is it that, just because we went to High School together - we should be friends on facebook. We didn't even like each other then?! I don't get it. And people that I was friends with - that I would never be friends with now (we have nothing in common, we don't talk, and they aren't the kind of people I necessarily want to have in my life and knowing my business)... So, why have them in my "friends" list?! It's not worth it if you ask me. So, I'm downsizing! I've already deleted over 200 friends - and I know I have plenty more to delete.

My question is, how do I delete the blogs that I'm following from my dashboard?! I'm not sure why I'm following some of them and I don't want to take up that space anymore. Does anyone know how to delete them?

Maybe when this is done I'll move on and clean my actual house.

#23 Surprise my husband

I thought that this goal would be the hardest of the entire bunch! I am horrible at keeping surprises a secret - I get too excited and always let it slip! However, this surprise I kept for an entire month!!!! Travis isn't a huge fan of Christmas. He is somewhat of a scrooge - I have my own thoughts about why this is - bu the just doesn't LOVE Christmas like I do. Last year, we didn't have a Christmas tree. It wasn't a huge deal since we weren't even going to be home for Christmas at all... but this year, we are having Christmas dinner at our house for both of our families so I thought we would need a tree. For the past month I have been hunting all over the internet and being sneaky and buying ornaments for our tree. I figured I would buy a tree, decorate it and be ready for him to come home one day... Surprise - we have a Christmas tree! I bought ornaments on ebay, etsy, and a bunch of random online shops. I got the last of my ornaments on the 6th of December and so the 9th was the day! My good friend Bethany and my little brother Spencer helped me buy a tree - put it up and decorate it while Travis was at work. He was completely surprised - and really liked the tree, the ornaments, and the decorations! I was totally proud of myself! I have since added other decorations - but this is what it looked like when Travis got home from work!

Me picking out our first Christmas tree - and it's real!

The tree and garland, up and decorated! There's more now - but this was a great start!

Travis was totally surprised! I can't believe I kept a secret for that long! Wow! I'm usually horrible at surprises - so imagine my surprise when I was able to pull it off! Woohoo! Merry Christmas!

# 26 Spend more time with family, friends, and loved ones

This has probably been one of my favorite goals! I spend a lot of time with my husband, and with my little brother Spencer (who until recently lived with Travis and I). I see my mom and sisters at school a couple of times per week - and usually see my dad at least once per week. So, Who is left out you may ask? Brian, Sarah, Austin and Conner! We can't forget about them! Well, I was lucky enough to accomplish this goal in the month of November! Sarah went to Australia for 3 weeks with her father, and since Brian needed to work - the little boys came up to Utah for pretty much the entire month of November! It was AWESOME! We all rearranged our schedules to help care for the boys - and I was lucky enough to get to spend every Friday with the boys! I made arrangements with a good friend of mine - to have play dates each Friday so that the boys could have kids to play with and so that Aunt Jenny wouldn't go crazy not being able to talk to anyone all day on Fridays!

November 5th - Austin and Conner and I went with Bethany, Isabelle, and Lucy to the Discovery Children's Museum at the Gateway. I had never been there before - and boy was it fun! The kids had SO much fun playing - I kept asking Austin if he needed to go potty and he kept saying "No Jenny, I need to play!" Here are a few pics of the boys at the museum.

Conner sleeping - by the end of the day he was exhausted!

Austin playing in the ball room - he LOVED the balls!

Conner in the baby play area - isn't he cute?!

Austin using a crane to move blocks to "build things"

Austin, Isabelle, Conner, and Lucy

On November 12th our friends couldn't play - so we went to the Mall and played in the play land with Aunt Shayla and Aunt Melissa! They had SO much fun! Both boys were so tired! I didn't take any pictures because it was just the mall play place - nothing too exciting :)

On November 19th the boys and I went to the Incredible Pizza Company and met Bethany, Isabelle, and Jackson for some food and fun! We had such a great time there! I didn't get a ton of pictures because Conner was pretty crabby and clingy. I got a few of the kids though with their face paints and Austin in a little car ride... I'll get some from Bethany and add them another time!

Austin riding a car - his reward for going down the slide like a big boy!

Austin with his Dragon, Isabelle the snow princess, and Jackson the dragon boy.

Austin with the dragon on his arm. He was SO proud of it!

I love these little boys so much and miss them terribly! I'm sad they live so far away - I hope they decide to move back here! I'd love to keep playing with them! I miss you guys!

# 18: Give more to Charity than I really should or really can afford

I am so glad I put this one on here... It made me think about people who are less fortunate than I am and it really made an impact on me!

One thing that is extremely important to Travis and I is education. Both of us have our Master's Degrees and plan on encouraging our future family to continue their education as well. So, when an opportunity came up to be able to donate money for education - we jumped at the chance.

Because of legislation this year - the budget for UVU was cut tremendously. The part that hurt the worst, was scholarships for financially struggling students. Because I teach in the behavioral sciences department - I was able to be a part of the First Annual Forgotten Carols Scholarship Gala. Michael Mclean sits on the advisory board for the School of Humanities and Social Science and volunteered to do a Forgotten Carols Scholarship Gala to encourage people to donate to the School for a good cause - but also giving them something in return.

Way back in September, Travis and I paid a rather hefty sum of money for two tickets to the Forgotten Carols through the Scholarship Fundraiser. On December 2nd, we attended the Gala to celebrate the Scholarship Recipients. Over 35 students applied for the scholarship, and two students were fortunate enough to receive a scholarship. One received a full scholarship, and the other a half scholarship. We are talking tuition, fees, books, living expenses, etc. As we met the two students, and had one at our table - both Travis and I felt truly blessed to be a part of this night!

As the Thank You for donating - we attended the Gala - were fed some super delicious good, met Michael Mclean, received a copy of the Forgotten Carols on CD with him reading the book and the music (which he autographed), and 2 VIP tickets to the show. Yes, the benefits were nice - but meeting the students (both of whom were behavioral science students) and seeing how grateful they were for a chance to continue their education was seriously amazing!

Because this is an annual thing - Travis and I will be attending each year. Well, we will be donating each year - I may be attending with a friend because Travis doesn't like the cheese factor of the Forgotten Carols... I, on the other hand, LOVE it - and it will have a special place in my heart now knowing that students at UVU will be able to have the financial means to continue their education.

# 8 Explore New Interests

Since I've been married I have learned that I actually like to cook. I enjoy cooking dinner - and Travis and I especially love cooking together. (although, usually i'm doing the cutting and chopping while he actually cooks) Well, I have always wanted to be able to make delicious goodies - so I decided to try my hand at baking... I think it was pretty successful! Here are some of the yummy things I have been making lately!

Yellow and Chocolate Cake Bites

Pumpkin White Chocolate Chunk and Candied Ginger Blondies

Apple cider spiced donut holes

Gooey Pumpkin Butterscotch Brownies

Marbled Pumpkin Cheesecake (gingersnap pecan crust)

Mini Pumpkin Pie Bites

Snickerdoodle Cake

Seriously - How did I never try baking before? I'm really loving it! And these are all essentially from scratch! I've also made some banana bread - but it wasn't really that impressive so I didn't take any pictures of them. I'm not sure what I want to try baking next.... any suggestions?

SHARK ATTACK!

If you know me well at all, you know that I am afraid of sharks! Yes - I know we live in Utah - that doesn't mean that I can't be afraid of them! This fear started when I was 17 and went fishing in the Pacific... I caught a dog shark that tried to eat me... Obviously my fear is not ridiculous! On the other hand - Travis thinks it's HILARIOUS that I'm afraid of sharks since we do live in Utah. I know it's a little ridiculous - and my good friend Bethany has decided to give me some exposure therapy to help rid me of my fear... until then, my dear husband decided to send me this cute little picture to show me that my fear is completely irrational! Yeah, if I decided NEVER to leave Utah, and NEVER to go to a beach... Not likely - remember the Dominican Republic? I still want to go! They have a snorkeling excursion with sharks... Not sure that I'm daring enough to do that... we will see! Enjoy my shark attack info! I'm sure you'll find it as entertaining as I did! :)