Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Motivation for Change!

So I guess it's time for me to admit it..... Time to suck it up and go public.... The truth is I need some help - so rather than keeping it a secret - here it goes!!! I joined weight watchers in the middle to end of February. Yes I did - and I'm so glad I did. I know you're thinking "she's trying yet another diet, blah blah blah" but this time is different - hopefully! I know the first thing people want to know is how much have I lost. Well let me tell you that depends on what day you're asking - actually, what week. Here's the problem - I've lost 28.8 pounds. Great right?! Right - except that then I keep gaining 2 1/2 pounds so my weight loss keeps fluctuating. I keep gaining and re-losing the same 3 pounds and I'm really frustrated by it. And I have a theory.... I know, me and my lame theories.

Every time i start a new weight loss program I think "this is it, the one that's going to work for me!" And approximatelyl 25 pounds later I think I'm doing well - fall off the bandwagon for a little and it's all downhill from there! I gain back those 25 and then some. Why do I do that? Because I'm dumb... That's not my theory. My theory is I like to sabatoge things in my life. Things start to go well and I think- gosh this is going really well, I wonder how i could screw it up?! And I always find a great way to do it! Not just in my weight loss efforts - but in my friendships - relationships - and other ships.... Okay maybe that's an exaggeration. The thing is that I think I was so excited about weight watchers and the first week I lost an astonishing 10 pounds and then the next week I lost 0.4 - who knew you could lose 0.4 pounds. Anyway - I think I'm just discouraged because even with the 25 that I've lost and kept off - I'm not really seeing any changes in my body. Sure I bought one size smaller pants - but the thing is - they're still big pants - and you'd think after 25 pounds you should get more than one size smaller. I guess when you have a lot to lose it takes longer to see it in yourself and for others to notice it too. Who even knows.

I think I'm just stuck in a rut. Afterall, how many times have I lost 25 pounds and then regained them? Too many to count! So it's like 25 isn't a big deal for me - even though that's a huge accomplishment! So - I did something drastic. Lots of my clients have token systems or sticker charts to help motivate them. Whenever they participate in a desired behavior they get a sticker or a token, and so many of those tokens will buy them exciting things like a new puzzle, or a new video game. Well, since puzzles and video games don't really motivate me - I went extreme! A new purse! Not just any purse - a fabulous new pink coach purse! It is SO cute! Plus, I found it on ebay - brand new with the tags and everything - and I got a killer deal on it. Then I did something Crazy and unlike me! I gave it to my friend! No not forever - don't worry! It is my motivation! I am just a couple of pounds away from my 10% weight loss goal - and that is a HUGE deal to me - I hope. So my friend is holding my purse ransom until I get my 10% key chain at the WW meeting. I want that purse SO bad! I love my blue coach purse - but it's time to move on to a pinker purse! So I'm trying hard to earn it! Hopefully it will be two or three weeks and I'll be sporting my new pink coach purse... afterall, I have to lose that pound I put on last week!!! It sucks that I like food so much!

In other small tidbits of information - I got an email from my sister today. She had her first baptism on Friday and it sounded AMAZING! The guy is paralyzeed and so the baptism involved 4 elders, one stretcher, 2 ambulances, and a really big font! It's such a great story! I'll share it with whoever wants to hear - it's just too special to put on my blog... So maybe we'll chat and I'll tell you the story. And look for me sporting the new Pink Coach Purse!!! She's a beaut... I think she needs a name.... Penny maybe.... nah, not Penny.... any suggestions are welcome.

1 comment:

April and Rick said...

Jen,
I am totally with you girl! I understand so much the self sabotage and all that. Weight Watchers is such a good diet. I also have so many weeks when I go up then down then up. But remember how far you have come and that all you have to do is stick with it and don't give up! I figure if it takes me a year to lose 30 pound then so be it! You look great though, I am proud of you. Don't get discouraged and just do your best. We will both have to do something nice for ourselves when we hit our 10%. I just wanted to give you a kick in the butt not to give up and keep at it. Good for you!