September 27, 2012

Dr. Heiner called me this morning. I had just pulled in to the office, and sat in the parking lot talking to him. He said that he was going to suggest we not do the PGD testing, because we only had two embryos left. He asked if we would want to implant them both regardless of the gender, and I said yes.  So, he scheduled my implantation for today at 12:30, where they will implant the remaining 2 embryos we have.

I got off the phone and immediately started bawling.  I don’t know why I am being so sensitive about it. Maybe because I am scared about it not working, and not having any frozen ones to potentially use later? Maybe because, for some reason, I felt a connection to these 10 embryos – I felt like, these would become some of my children, and to have all but 2 lost – has been quite devastating!

I called Travis and let him know – and I could tell he was trying to be brave for me because he knew I was crying. He kept apologizing and saying he wished he had been with me when I got the phone call. He is such a wonderful man. I love him so much, and I REALLY hope at least one of these embryos takes.

Katie, the nurse called me and told me I need to make sure I don’t wear any perfume or anything – so Travis and I will both need to shower again.  She said the embryos are 4bb’s  which means they would still fall into the “good” category. She said by the time I get to the office for the implantation they should be hatching, and they will give me a picture of them. I hope they take!